Small Wedding vs Big Weddings: Decide What’s Right for Your Big Day
One of the first major choices couples face when planning a wedding is deciding between a small wedding vs big wedding guest list. Do you picture a huge party with everyone you know? A cozy gathering of your closest people? Or something even more intimate—like a micro wedding?
There’s no one-size-fits-all answer. But understanding the pros and cons of big weddings, small weddings, and micro weddings can help you figure out what makes the most sense for your vision, priorities, and budget.
As a wedding and elopement photographer, I’ve worked with couples across the full spectrum—and this guide is here to help you explore your options, along with tips for including loved ones and making each version feel true to you whether you are planning on a Small Wedding vs Big Wedding.
What is a Micro Wedding?
A micro wedding usually includes 20 guests or fewer. It still has the structure and feel of a traditional wedding (ceremony, vows, photos, dinner), but on a much smaller scale. Sometimes this can even be referred to as an elopement, depending on the level of formality and whether guests are present. The lines between elopements and micro weddings have blurred in recent years—what really sets a micro wedding apart is that it still includes thoughtful details and planning, just without the overwhelm of a large guest list. You get the best of both worlds: an intentional experience, without sacrificing the meaningful moments.
Think of it as the sweet spot between an elopement and a full wedding—intimate and meaningful, without skipping the details you care about.
Pros:
Intentionality above all. With so few people, you get to craft a day that feels deeply personal, without pressure to follow traditional expectations.
Tip: Write custom vows, have a family-style meal, or include unique experiences like a group hike, private chef, or unplugged ceremony.
Budget-stretching flexibility. Micro weddings can be more affordable when considering small wedding vs. big weddings—but they can also allow you to upgrade your experience with better food, a designer dress, or a stunning destination.
Trick: Create a “dream budget” list before you plan anything. What would you do if you didn’t have to plan around 150 people?
Unforgettable locations. Want to get married in the mountains, a forest clearing, a backyard, or a cabin rental? Micro weddings give you so much freedom with your venue.
Tip: Look into Airbnb or VRBO listings with event-friendly rules and beautiful views. Many of these work best for groups under 20.
Cons:
Limited guest list can be tough. Even more than with a small wedding, a micro wedding means making hard choices. But this also lets you focus on who matters most.
Tip: You can still include extended family and friends with thoughtful add-ons like a reception later, a live-streamed ceremony, or mailed keepsakes.
May not feel “wedding-y” enough for some. If you’ve always dreamed of a packed dance floor and wedding party entrances, a micro wedding might not fit the bill.
Trick: Pick 2–3 traditional elements you do want to include—like a first dance, cake cutting, or champagne toast—to keep the vibe festive.
Ways to include loved ones even if they aren’t there:
Send out professional photos or a printed announcement after the wedding
Host a dinner party, casual reception, or backyard celebration later
Ask for letters, voice recordings, or video messages from friends and family to play on your wedding day
Record your vows or ceremony and share the replay
What to Expect with a Small Wedding (20–50 Guests)
A small wedding vs big wedding comparison often comes down to connection versus scale. Small weddings allow more flexibility while still having the feel of a classic celebration.
Pros:
Time with the people who matter most. A small wedding vs big weddings let you spend the day connecting with each guest, instead of rushing through hugs and handshakes.
More relaxed pace. With fewer moving parts and people to coordinate, you get to soak it all in and be present. No production-style timelines here.
Cons:
You’ll still face some guest list challenges no matter whether it is a small wedding vs. big wedding. Especially if you have big families or friend groups. You’ll need to prioritize—but that’s not a bad thing.
It can fall into a middle ground. Too big to feel like a micro wedding, but too small for the full wedding energy. It all depends on how you design the day.
Tips:
- Consider splitting your guest list into ceremony and reception if needed
- Host a multi-day event with family dinners or activities to spread out the time with guests
- Keep the timeline flexible to enjoy the day without rushing
Planning a Larger Wedding (100+ Guests)
Big weddings bring energy, tradition, and community into your day—but also more logistics and budget considerations.
Pros:
- Big energy, big celebration. If you want a party atmosphere, full dance floor, and the excitement of having everyone there—this is it.
- You get to include everyone. No stress about cutting the list. Friends from all chapters of life, coworkers, extended relatives—bring them all.
- More room for tradition. If honoring cultural customs or large family rituals is important to you, a big wedding gives you space to do it all.
Cons:
- Higher cost and more logistics. Bigger guest list = more of everything: chairs, plates, meals, drinks, transportation, and stress.
- Harder to be fully present. It’s common to feel like the day flies by and you didn’t actually talk to half your guests.
Tips:
- Hire a planner or day-of coordinator to manage logistics whether you’re having a small wedding vs. big wedding
- Add a welcome dinner or brunch to extend time with guests
- Plan a quiet moment just for you two—sunset portraits, private vows, or a first look
- Use tools like Zola’s Wedding Guest List to stay organized, and when you’re ready to start planning, reach out directly through my website so we can build your dream day together
Can You Mix and Match Styles with a Small Wedding vs. Big Weddings? Absolutely.
Many couples are combining the best of both worlds. Here are some creative ways to do that:
- Have a micro or small wedding now, then a larger reception later
- Elope privately, then throw a celebration with friends and family at home
- Keep the ceremony intimate, but invite everyone to the reception or after celebratory party
- Plan a destination micro wedding and livestream it for guests back home
Final Thoughts
Whether you’re leaning toward a micro wedding, a small wedding vs big wedding setup, or something in between—your wedding should feel like you.
Want help deciding what’s right for your day? I offer complimentary planning calls with every couple I photograph to talk through ideas, priorities, and help shape a celebration that reflects who you are.
Still planning your wedding? Check out more tips over on The Wedding Experience page or reach out to start planning your adventure.